How to Build a Life with a New Spouse in Your Golden Years

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Finding new love later in life will enrich your golden years with excitement, happiness, and a sense of meaning. But if you’ve been single for a while, building a new life with someone can feel like unchartered territory. How can you successfully merge two separate lifestyles into one? Good communication, respect, and a sense of humor will go a long way towards establishing a healthy foundation for a lasting relationship. On top of these important ingredients, here are some tips to enrich your new marriage!

Forging New Connections After Loss

If you lost a previous spouse, creating a new relationship can be challenging. Many seniors feel a sense of guilt when getting remarried after the death of a previous partner. How are you supposed to overcome this and build a meaningful relationship with someone else? Try to remember that dating or remarrying after losing your spouse doesn’t mean that you’re forgetting the past. You can grieve the loss of a spouse and love someone new at the same time.

Choose a Home

Once you’re married, you’ll have to decide whether to move into your spouse’s home, have them move in with you, or find a new place if your current spaces don’t have enough room for the two of you. If one of you needs to sell a home, connect with an expert realtor in your area. When it’s time to show the home, make sure to stage it properly, reduce clutter, remove any pets, and take valuables out of the home.

Pursue New Hobbies and Adventures

Like launching a business, exploring new hobbies with your spouse is a great way to enrich your relationship and fill your retirement with meaningful activities. Challenge each other to learn something new! Learn how to play a new instrument, speak a foreign language, or grow a backyard garden. Take classes on cooking, ballroom dancing, drama, photography, or writing. Learning a new hobby will keep your brains sharp and help you bond over a new mutual interest!

Accept the Challenges of Aging

Having someone by your side is bound to make the aging process a lot easier. However, age-related challenges can also put a strain on your new relationship. Be sure to discuss the future openly so you can plan for anticipated obstacles. For example, you should both be prepared to accept the physical changes and cognitive deficiencies that come with aging. As long as you’re both willing to adapt to change, you’ll be able to ride out any challenges that come your way!

Support Your Partner’s Independence

Strong relationships rely on independence just as much as togetherness. If both you and your partner are retired, you’ll have to find creative ways to give each other independence. Talkspace suggests making space in your relationship for mindful time apart. Spending time alone once in a while is important for self-reflection and self-discovery.

There are many ways you and your spouse can support each other’s independence, even when you’re both occupying the same space all day. Rediscover some of your old hobbies on your own, get outside for a solitary walk, or reconnect with old friends. The time you spend apart will only make your relationship stronger.

It’s never too late to get married. In fact, getting married in your senior years can be a wonderful experience! You and your spouse will bring a lot of wisdom and understanding to your marriage that will help you forge a strong and long-lasting relationship.

Couples Corner Counselling offers professional couples counselling and marital therapy in New Brunswick. Call 506.850.2254 or complete this form to book an appointment today.

About the author:

Annabelle Harris is the creator of Elders.Center. Her goal is to help soon-to-be-seniors and already-seniors move gracefully into their golden years with less fear and more confidence. The site features a plethora of resources to help answer common and not-so-common questions about aging.